How I Am Handling Grief
We all experience grief, sooner or later
It’s one of the harsh realities of life. Grief. We all experience it sooner or later.
If you are blessed with a long life, it’s inevitable that you’ll experience some combination of loss, despair, and tragedy.
I recently experienced all of the above when my dad died two-and-a-half months before my grandpa also passed away. From June through September of this year, I lost two of the most important men in my life.
The 5 truths you must accept
In the video above I discuss the 5 truths that have helped me handle and make sense of my grief. Here’s a summary:
Everyone handles grief differently - find the best way to handle it for yourself, whether that’s through a support network or with more solitude.
Accept that the person is never coming back - this may seem obvious, but it’s not. Having someone ripped away from your life, even after a long illness, can feel sudden and jarring. Coming to this realization - and accepting it - can help you handle your new reality.
Embrace suffering - I pulled this from Buddhism. Admittedly, I’m not an expert in their philosophy and religion, but the baseline idea of embracing suffering, and not trying to fight it, is very powerful. We learn so much about ourselves and the world by letting the suffering in, understanding how it makes us feel, and moving forward anew.
Create and improve yourself - channel any negative or sad emotions in a positive way by creating. Use grief as a motivation to create something beautiful or to improve yourself in a meaningful way. Your loved ones would want you to honor their lives, and there are few better ways to do so than by creating and improving.
Cherish every day - you never know when a second might be your last. If there’s anything to learn from grief it’s how fragile and finite life truly is. Take advantage of every second. Don’t be frivolous with your time.
Grief can be a positive experience
This may sound oxymoronic. Trust me, it’s not. And it’s not like I am enjoying any part of mourning the loss of my dad or grandfather.
On the contrary, I’m trying to channel my personal devastation into something positive. Something worthwhile. A meaningful contribution to the world.
This can be personal. Whether it’s improving your friendships, romantic partnerships, or how you connect to your own children.
It can be professional as well. What better way to honor someone than by using their loss as motivation to leave a positive impact on the world through your craft?
How have you handled grief?
If you’ve experienced grief in your own life, I’d love to hear how you’ve handled it in the comments.
I’m not sure if my approach is the best way. The wounds for me are still pretty fresh.
Prior to my dad dying, I had never witnessed someone die. Prior to my grandpa dying, I had never stood alone on my section of the family tree.
Any wisdom or insight that you can impart would be most appreciated.
Thank you, as always, for reading.