I’m not sure we find men with more empathy. We have to raise them to be that way, and society has clearly been doing the opposite—especially with white men who have felt dismissed, left behind, like they don’t matter. And yeah, how do you change that when you have these big personalities you mentioned, along with people like Tim Denning, Dan Koe and Justin Welsh, who don’t exactly lead with empathy but have huge influence.
These types of men exist but they’re not as heavily online as some of the guys you mentioned and who I’m referring to. They’re too busy raising families and being good citizens in the world.
As for the online guys, there’s too much incentive to act tough, macho, and “pull yourself by your bootstraps” because the guys you mentioned (in particular) have to act like gurus to sell courses and other digital products. Little room for empathy there.
But I’m hopeful we can change the narrative with better examples of male “influencers” (Timm Chiusano, Blake of Today, Thoren Bradley) that carve out positive corners of the internet filled with empathy, compassion, and generosity.
I completely agree. When people say there are no good men, I always say many are married and the rest are at home Friday night like us—reading a book or watching a good flick. They’re out there but harder to find. Society makes it difficult for men to be empathetic because it’s not seen as manly. The problem is some men never grow out of that immaturity. Look at Mark Manson. He started like that but now has a much more mature view. Unfortunately most of them online never find that trajectory.
I am no fan of violence, but I don't think people understand how bad it's getting for even legal citizens out here. ICE was camped out at our local Home Depot all weekend. I would resist too if masked men came for me at my place of work.
I’m not sure we find men with more empathy. We have to raise them to be that way, and society has clearly been doing the opposite—especially with white men who have felt dismissed, left behind, like they don’t matter. And yeah, how do you change that when you have these big personalities you mentioned, along with people like Tim Denning, Dan Koe and Justin Welsh, who don’t exactly lead with empathy but have huge influence.
These types of men exist but they’re not as heavily online as some of the guys you mentioned and who I’m referring to. They’re too busy raising families and being good citizens in the world.
As for the online guys, there’s too much incentive to act tough, macho, and “pull yourself by your bootstraps” because the guys you mentioned (in particular) have to act like gurus to sell courses and other digital products. Little room for empathy there.
But I’m hopeful we can change the narrative with better examples of male “influencers” (Timm Chiusano, Blake of Today, Thoren Bradley) that carve out positive corners of the internet filled with empathy, compassion, and generosity.
I completely agree. When people say there are no good men, I always say many are married and the rest are at home Friday night like us—reading a book or watching a good flick. They’re out there but harder to find. Society makes it difficult for men to be empathetic because it’s not seen as manly. The problem is some men never grow out of that immaturity. Look at Mark Manson. He started like that but now has a much more mature view. Unfortunately most of them online never find that trajectory.
I love using food as a love language, too.
Tony gave us permission to love the world as it is.
He didn't flinch from the hard stuff, and he didn't hide his flaws. That's what made him unique.
Happy Monday from anarchist California! 🙂
Food may be the best love language!
I was so proud of you all in California this weekend - really impressive displays of civil disobedience.
Thank you for reading, Neela!
I am no fan of violence, but I don't think people understand how bad it's getting for even legal citizens out here. ICE was camped out at our local Home Depot all weekend. I would resist too if masked men came for me at my place of work.
No problem at all, John.